I know what I'm doing, I'm just a bit selfish. You know that maybe-someday-but-not-today thing? Well, that is it. He's mature, smart, has a future. I can't confirm whether he’s an asshole or not yet but even if he were, he won't be able to mess with me and I tell myself that he had 2 serious relationships, so even if I end up hurting him, I ain't gonna be the one he remembers anyways, so I'm safe either way. I’m so horrible.
Sometimes, even me I can’t believe the crazy and fucked up things I did, but I still somehow feel more mature than most people my age. I'm probably making people's life complicated right now though. I just think I seriously need to figure out what the hell I want and act accordingly.