I'm so vain ♥
Choice
Sunday 13 November 2011
No matter how unfair, selfish or immoral that could be and even if it's only one day, I nonetheless want to be there. Don't ask me why. No reason.
He and I have tomorrow to make it right, but you and I only have today. Today could be that last day we spend together in our entire life, until the day we die. It's expected and I don't intent to make it otherwise. Without expectations, there are no confusions. Without confusions, there are no worries, and we can still be close and I'll still feel the same the next day when I wake up.
...but sometimes, I do wonder what if, what could have been..
Perhaps, there are things that you'd just rather wonder.
He and I have tomorrow to make it right, but you and I only have today. Today could be that last day we spend together in our entire life, until the day we die. It's expected and I don't intent to make it otherwise. Without expectations, there are no confusions. Without confusions, there are no worries, and we can still be close and I'll still feel the same the next day when I wake up.
...but sometimes, I do wonder what if, what could have been..
Perhaps, there are things that you'd just rather wonder.
Tuesday 8 November 2011
I wasn't going to bother with this, but...
"You don't know how to satisfy your man, that's why they all leave you."
1. Touching my hands doesn't make you my boyfriend. And getting in my pants doesn't make you my man. Who do you think you are and how do you even know?!
2. There are things that are not correlated with your efforts, especially with this guy. Don't ask me how I know. In those situations, you need to have the discipline, character, and self-respect to say, "fuck that, I'm doing what I like." Might as well, right?
3. I spend time with him and I'm nice to him because I want to, not because I need to. I honestly think it's worth it, but that isn't necessarily what I deserve. And even if want him, I actually have a lot more choices.
4. Oh and, do they all leave me? Ha, don't you worry for me!
What I don't understand is that, why the hell is he so mad? Just because I'm not acting like his bitch? What I also don't understand is that, why am I not mad? and sad? or pissed?...well actually, I think it's because I have the ultimate answer to the first question.
Some mistakes cannot be made more than once.To satisfy him, I’d have to ignore my gut instincts and feelings. I’d have to compromise the values that have made me into the person I am today. At this point in my life? I have a career, a family and a bright future; I don't fucking need to please nobody.
"You don't know how to satisfy your man, that's why they all leave you."
1. Touching my hands doesn't make you my boyfriend. And getting in my pants doesn't make you my man. Who do you think you are and how do you even know?!
2. There are things that are not correlated with your efforts, especially with this guy. Don't ask me how I know. In those situations, you need to have the discipline, character, and self-respect to say, "fuck that, I'm doing what I like." Might as well, right?
3. I spend time with him and I'm nice to him because I want to, not because I need to. I honestly think it's worth it, but that isn't necessarily what I deserve. And even if want him, I actually have a lot more choices.
4. Oh and, do they all leave me? Ha, don't you worry for me!
What I don't understand is that, why the hell is he so mad? Just because I'm not acting like his bitch? What I also don't understand is that, why am I not mad? and sad? or pissed?...well actually, I think it's because I have the ultimate answer to the first question.
Some mistakes cannot be made more than once.To satisfy him, I’d have to ignore my gut instincts and feelings. I’d have to compromise the values that have made me into the person I am today. At this point in my life? I have a career, a family and a bright future; I don't fucking need to please nobody.
At peace
Sunday 6 November 2011
I just want to say that I'm in a better place now. I find myself less reflective as I used to be and perhaps, I'm just ignorant and blissfully living in a state of denial, but right or wrong, truth or lies, do all this really matter? What really is that important? If anything, I find myself at peace. Just let me keep my eyes shut for a little longer...
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