I'm afraid I'm giving you too much pressure. I know I shouldn't wait for you. I shouldn't wait for that day. You wouldn't be happy if you knew that. I said I didn't cry today, but I'm crying as I'm writing this.
Do you remember when I asked you why do you never buy me flower? Or write me letters? You said have to save it for a day when you'll fuck up. I cried after hearing that because I knew there wouldn't be such a day for two reasons. I would never leave you and if I did, you would not come after me like you used to. In fact, you let go of me several times already.
Sometimes, being loved by someone can be a weight on our shoulders. Maybe that's why you told me last night that it was unfair to me. I don't want to be a baggage to you, Jonathan...but what can I do? I miss you so much. I'm so sorry. I love you.