Renan sent me a message. The message is actually just a few lines long but I read it over and over again. I'm still reading it. I really don't understand. Why did he have to tell me this? Why did I even tell him everything honestly just to deserve this? I never had the courage to tell anyone what hapenned to me but I still told him just because I didn't want him to think that I'm brainfucking him. He could've left without saying anything...I think I'd be so much happier. I really tried for him no matter how hard it was, I didn't complain, made resolutions, thought about giving up so many times but still sucked up the tears, took risks and carried on because I thought it was worth it. I even tried to change those things he didn't like about me; I stopped being so stubborn, tried to be more open and smile more... Did he see that? Now he's telling me that I'm not worth it...and telling me how I give him headaches.
The other day, I was in a drugstore and saw a cream for treatment of sunburns and I thought about him but my friend told me to not do such useless things. I still secretly went back to get it for him...
...but now it's useless.
I remember the first time he took me for a ride, he told me that there will be many more to come in the future. Then one day, he said that he'll bring me to his secret place somewhere in the north....All lies...why did he lie to me? He already had all the fun he wanted...so now it's over.
My dad always told me that no one will ever like me.