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“The things which we fear the most in life have already happened to us” as Robin Williams stated but, his theory is incomplete. If things which we fear most have already became history, then what makes them terrifying? Is it perhaps the possibility of their return? Nietzsche once called the concept of eternal return horrifying and consists of the heaviest of burdens; we drown beneath its weight. I believe this is true. Otherwise, if banned to return, the magnitude of beauty and consequences of horridness mean nothing and will eventually become mere light breeze in the air, frightening no one.
I’m not sure since when or why, but somewhere along the way, I started to adopt that mindset that expects all my relationships to go downhill eventually. I almost fantasize about the end of them…perhaps because the intolerable weight takes away the raw and unguarded moments that I yearn to live. That weight, although heavy on every move I make, is valuable and I still believe it merits the sacrifice. However, worth is subjective and what is seen as worthy is not necessarily what we deserve.
I have always thought it was my destiny to end up alone, living a life that is lighter than air, enjoying the days without tomorrows, taking things as they come, discovering new adventures hid around each corner… all in the absence of that heavy burden...
…then again, I really hope someone is able to convince me of the opposite. I often heard that when it’s perfect, no one has to bend or break, value doesn’t always cause back pain. The question is; does such perfection exist in reality or only in invented fantasy? Maybe there's something I still don't understand and have yet to discover...
I’m not sure since when or why, but somewhere along the way, I started to adopt that mindset that expects all my relationships to go downhill eventually. I almost fantasize about the end of them…perhaps because the intolerable weight takes away the raw and unguarded moments that I yearn to live. That weight, although heavy on every move I make, is valuable and I still believe it merits the sacrifice. However, worth is subjective and what is seen as worthy is not necessarily what we deserve.
I have always thought it was my destiny to end up alone, living a life that is lighter than air, enjoying the days without tomorrows, taking things as they come, discovering new adventures hid around each corner… all in the absence of that heavy burden...
…then again, I really hope someone is able to convince me of the opposite. I often heard that when it’s perfect, no one has to bend or break, value doesn’t always cause back pain. The question is; does such perfection exist in reality or only in invented fantasy? Maybe there's something I still don't understand and have yet to discover...