跟着我走 7月 11日

She always follows me behind.
Sometimes I wonder if she's scared of me.

Monkey Beach 18/17/09

At a certain monkey beach...some thai bar.

...with Isi.

Btw, those glasses obviously don't belong to me.

For some reasons, we ended up with zero money so we had to beg on the street but it didn't work out.

Entertaining the Americans

Why TJ is so nice?

Waw I made it home before the sunrise!

So last night, TJ called me at night as predicted. It's kind of boring when guys are so predictable, but at least I know I'm smarter than them, ha. He asked me out to grab a bite somewhere, but I made up excuses because he actually made me cry on the phone but he doesn't know. How can I explain this...he's kind of thoughful and sensitive. But I won't thank him for being understanding, anyways because he's way too nosy. So I said I took my shower and that I don't eat at night and blablas, but he was really insistant, so I still went to see him and we went to drink/eat. For the whole time, I kept wondering if he's trying to play some kind of prank on me, but it was actually pretty cool. Why would a guy be so nice if the girl doesn't even feel sorry for what she did? We all wish we were the exception but according to the rule, there is only one reason; men are rejects of life. If I were ugly and fat, would he still be that nice? and what if I were nice to him, would he still call? Obviously___(write your 2-character answer).

Thanks for caring

Thanks for caring. Thanks for paying attention. I found out what I wanted to know. Things came out as predicted. Isn't that scary? Thanks for being stupid enough to let me know. Now I can use that against you. I wish you were not an asshole, y'know.

Thanks for letting me know that you care.
From now on, you’ll be the jester.

Sorry for being conceited...NOT

...at least I got the chance to be conceited

So I talked to TJ on the phone and the whole conversation was just so pointless! He was saying that he’s not mad anymore but what I did wasn’t okay and all that crap. So I asked what he wanted and he didn’t even know. Would a sorry do? He said yes so I apologized. Then he asked if I meant it. Well no, I don’t and I’m just honest and I won’t be able to feel sorry even if I wanted to. Really I don’t see why I’d feel sorry.

A blog is a blog…sort of like an intimate journal, right? Not as if I’m making money out of it…It’s what I think and what I am. Why should I ever feel sorry about myself? It’s as if he thinks that I’m a conceited princess…should he feel sorry if that’s how he feels? No. He even said that in my face and I’m not even mad at anything.

On top of that, he intruded my fuckin privacy. He went on my facebook account because I forgot to logout and that’s how he found out about the blog. I feel like someone saw me naked or as if some random people stepped in my property. So is that still my fault? Should I feel sorry because I am what I am and I think what I think? What a pointless conversation. He said he wants me to know how he feels. He feels like an object because he's being rated on my blog and all that crap and he's hurted that this kind of shit exists. Hm, doesn't everyone hold opinions on everyone and some people are simply more interesting/important than others? The difference is that I posted it in my blog on a 1-10 scale, which is my personal space anyway.

Actually, I know how he feels, but that doesn’t mean I’ll care and it doesn't mean I think he's right. If I had to care about everyone I meet, I’d be fucking busy. If I really didn’t give a shit at all, I don’t think I’d send him txt messages. Hey, I just wanted to make thinks a little less awkward, is that wrong? Some people just think they are right because they think they are the victim of the story.

At least I don’t think he’s a complete asshole but he had the guts to tell me he doesn’t know why he’s that open to me. Why? Don’t tell me it’s because of my bitchy personality. Let me laugh. I mean, we’re abroad for only a short-term period, why be so serious? Can’t he just take it easy and just have fun? What’s the point of making me feel bad. Ah gosh.

So dude, if you didn't judge me as you said...then where the hell "princess disease" and "cold-blooded beast" came out from? Not from your mouth I hope.

Rant post about brainless Ronnie

I'm so fuckin pissed today, all because of some stupid immature people and I will tell you who. His name is Ronnie, middle name is Marlow, nickname is marshmallow and I don't know his last name. Even if I knew, I won't post it because I’m afraid that people with the same last name as him will feel ashamed. By the way R in my previous post is him. That dude is just immature and thinks he's that opened-minded and kind. I guess he is a nice person to his male friends or ugly female friends he got not interest in, but he really treats other women like crap. Today, he threw a piece of garbage at me and ran to hide. What kind of undeveloped-brain would do that sort of stupid and low-class thing? When that guy grows up, he'll probably end up beating women. I'm not even kidding, I know what I’m talking about even if I'm damn angry right now.
He got all the symptoms of an abuser:
-He treats women like crap and he thinks he’s superior
-He can’t control his temper
-He’s insecure
-He acts out instead of expressing himself verbally
-He may even have a family history of violence. He’s from Texas, so who knows.

I almost wanted to throw water in his hideous face, but why would I stoop to his level, right? And no, he didn’t say sorry. I'm not even expecting a sorry because I won’t forgive that kind of behaviour. He's the kind of white guys who go to Asian countries to sleep with women because he thinks he's that superior and all Asian women will fall for his popsicle look. In reality, he's only a little rejected and lifeless cowboy in the conservative state of Texas. Man, that’s just foolish. He has to throw garbage at me just because I don’t sleep with him? Poor boy, I'm almost sad for him.

Oh and he said something about it, I think he said that he did that because of the nasty txt messages I sent. I don't know which ones he was talking about because there were a lot. I know I'm really bitchy, but I'm only bitchy to men like him. I despise all those brainless perverts who pretend to be kind just so they can get laid. I Fuckin hate that. I’m not even joking. On the other hand, I know lots of people hate self-centered and bitchy people like me, but really, I don’t mind and they have the right to regard me as whatever. But I gotta say that I love myself and I love being self-centered because I’m happy that way. You can be happy to be a pervert too…We can’t get along with everyone and we should just live and let others live. I'm just really angry and I need to let this out. Hey, at least I don’t throw garbage on others when I’m angry!

If you're curious, here are the txts.

Ronnie: Id take a blowjob **Who does he take me for? At this point, I think it’s clear that he’s just retarded. Me: You do whatever you like **I don’t know what he thought, but what I meant is that he can do whatever he likes, but nothing that involves me. Ronnie: ur kidding, u better please my 9 inch dick **??? Me: did u get that 9 inch from subway's take out? Ronnie: ya its called ronnies dick **STUPID. Me: go get some other chicks with that then **Isn’t that more clear? Ronnie: ha it's up to u **What the hell is he saying? Ok maybe he was drunk. And I also hate people who blame everything on alcohol. What an irresponsible little wacko. I didn’t answer that. Ronnie: I thought you were down **He sent this the next morning.

Last saturday, I was sitting right next to him at the bar but I wanted to sit near my friend Ahn, so I told him to switch with her and I'd do anything in return. Yeah I obviously lied, but that guy is so desperate to sleep with me that he believed me. So he told me to call him later to get together, but of course I didn’t. Even if I lied, I don’t think I'm wrong. It's just a game. He were nice to me until he realised that he will never be able to sleep with me, so he showed me what kind of immature little beast he is. Isn't that a bigger lie?

Ok so, the white guy is Ronnie and the fat asian is Mike.


Look at that man, he's problaby used to "swallowing".

Yeah swallow that shit you nasty bitch.

That wasn’t all; there is this guy who came to give me a message on a piece of paper. Yes a piece of paper...as if we were still in high school. But I don't feel like talking about that crap right now, I'm so sleepy, I need to get some sleep.

What a shit talking post, but I feel better right now.