I went into this knowing my chest will ache a little more, but what have I not seen?
Sometimes, I think I know him...but other times, he really isn't all of that. Everytime I think we're getting closer, I realize I'm stuck one step behind. I'm strong and can handle anything, I tell myself. These past few months, I tried my best to be myself.
It's always a circle of us coming, staying and going our opposite ways...and I always come back, and I'm taken for granted. These past few days have been especially hard. Pretending is so hard. Reminding myself that we're just each other's stop-gap is hard. There is so much I want to say but there is no place for that...
The euphoria lasts for a while but the emptiness of knowing is worst. You would think I should know better by now, but maybe this is the fairytale...we always hope.
And maybe this time, it's time to walk.