Perhaps somewhere in time and space
Some feelings mistakenly interchanged
Time and space
Saturday, 29 November 2008
Perhaps somewhere in time and space
Some feelings mistakenly interchanged
I am promiscuous
Friday, 28 November 2008
So am I promiscuous? Am I a beast that no one would like? Everytime we argue, I tell myself that you don't know what you are talking about and that I don't need to care because it is not worth it. But how do you want me to not care? I am not "beast" enough to be careless. Don't you know you're hurting me? Aren't you are more fucked up than I am? Are you going to be happier if no one likes me?
Sunday, 16 November 2008
I'm sorry for being a wild beast, but I really wish you will die soon...
and as that day finally comes, I will regret until the end...
because no one on Earth will possibly love a wild beast as much as you did.
and as that day finally comes, I will regret until the end...
because no one on Earth will possibly love a wild beast as much as you did.
Ethical Slut
Friday, 3 October 2008
I read a very interesting book that I would like to share with you guys. It is titled The Ethical Slut: A guide to Infinite Sexual Possibilities written by the famous Dossie Easton and Catherine A. Liszt. I don't know if you read it but I strongly recommend it. This blog entry contains relevant quotes from the article and my very own personal opinions.
I've been called nympho or slut several times for various reasons. I laugh when I hear those comments, it tells a lot about our culture and society. "Sluts are evil, uncaring, amoral and destructive". Honestly, I used to think that way when I was younger, I was afraid to be dirtied. This is how I was taught by society. My asian parents are, of course, the typical type so that does not help.
I see many people who are not open about sex and I can understand that sex is better kept private. Some other people would say that sex is only after marriage, which i totally respect as well. They have their sense of ethics. But here is my point of view: I do not see the point of restricting ourselves to pleasure. I would feel so bad if I wasn't able to admit things I love and to restrict myself to those rules. That's for the religious folks: "To believe that God doesn't like sex is like believing that God doesn't like you" "We have never met anyone who had low self-esteem at the moment of orgasm".
Ethical Sluts' core values is pleasure. I believe that life is an opportunity to experience as much as we can, to taste all the flavours of life, to do things we like, things that make us feel good! I do not care about my GPA, credit cards, money, status and all that stuff. Did you know that if you were at about 100 km above Earth's surface, you might be able to see two things: China's great wall that looks like a snake and Vegas that looks like a star. If you are on the moon, you don't see anything constructed by Human Beings. You might see clouds, oceans, the north/south poles...Would you still worry about other people's critiques? would you still care about those unwritten social rules?
We cherish pleasure but that doesn't mean that we will do whatever we want even though it hurts people around us. "We are ethical people, ethical sluts. It is very important to us to treat people well and not hurt anyone. Our ethical come from our own sense of rightness, and from the empathy and love we hold for those around us." Another very important value for ethical sluts is consent.
We are honest, we recognize the ramifications of our sexual choices, we are respectful, we are realistic and we do not try to be everything we cannot be.
In our society...or in most of societies i should say, people value monogamy. People assume that this is the only right way because it has always been that way. This is not wrong because it is not against your will. However, I think that all types of relationships should be valued for what they really are and we can achieve the same things in every type. But sex is about pleasure, this is the primary goal..."there is nothing wrong with sex for sex's sake." Secondary goals include much more such as romantic love and other stuff like reproduction, but pleasure is the most basic goal.
"Longevity is not a good criterion by which to judge the success or failure of a relationship." Did you learn something out of it? Did you get the pleasure you wanted, did you feel good about yourself ? If you answer yes, then do not regret it. The word "always" could describe a short moment...Cherish every moment of your life. "One-night stands can be intense, life-enhancing and fulfilling; so can lifetime love affairs. While ethical sluts may choose to have some kinds of relationships and not others, we believe that all relationships have the potential to teach us, move us. and above all give us pleasure."
"You don't need a lot of "thou shalt nots" to be an ethical person. Honesty, empathy, foresight, integrity, intelligence and respect will do just fine."
Everyone is wonderful, there is no need to be ashamed of anything because if you do, it will cost you your happiness. Respect yourself and people around you.
I've been called nympho or slut several times for various reasons. I laugh when I hear those comments, it tells a lot about our culture and society. "Sluts are evil, uncaring, amoral and destructive". Honestly, I used to think that way when I was younger, I was afraid to be dirtied. This is how I was taught by society. My asian parents are, of course, the typical type so that does not help.
I see many people who are not open about sex and I can understand that sex is better kept private. Some other people would say that sex is only after marriage, which i totally respect as well. They have their sense of ethics. But here is my point of view: I do not see the point of restricting ourselves to pleasure. I would feel so bad if I wasn't able to admit things I love and to restrict myself to those rules. That's for the religious folks: "To believe that God doesn't like sex is like believing that God doesn't like you" "We have never met anyone who had low self-esteem at the moment of orgasm".
Ethical Sluts' core values is pleasure. I believe that life is an opportunity to experience as much as we can, to taste all the flavours of life, to do things we like, things that make us feel good! I do not care about my GPA, credit cards, money, status and all that stuff. Did you know that if you were at about 100 km above Earth's surface, you might be able to see two things: China's great wall that looks like a snake and Vegas that looks like a star. If you are on the moon, you don't see anything constructed by Human Beings. You might see clouds, oceans, the north/south poles...Would you still worry about other people's critiques? would you still care about those unwritten social rules?
We cherish pleasure but that doesn't mean that we will do whatever we want even though it hurts people around us. "We are ethical people, ethical sluts. It is very important to us to treat people well and not hurt anyone. Our ethical come from our own sense of rightness, and from the empathy and love we hold for those around us." Another very important value for ethical sluts is consent.
We are honest, we recognize the ramifications of our sexual choices, we are respectful, we are realistic and we do not try to be everything we cannot be.
In our society...or in most of societies i should say, people value monogamy. People assume that this is the only right way because it has always been that way. This is not wrong because it is not against your will. However, I think that all types of relationships should be valued for what they really are and we can achieve the same things in every type. But sex is about pleasure, this is the primary goal..."there is nothing wrong with sex for sex's sake." Secondary goals include much more such as romantic love and other stuff like reproduction, but pleasure is the most basic goal.
"Longevity is not a good criterion by which to judge the success or failure of a relationship." Did you learn something out of it? Did you get the pleasure you wanted, did you feel good about yourself ? If you answer yes, then do not regret it. The word "always" could describe a short moment...Cherish every moment of your life. "One-night stands can be intense, life-enhancing and fulfilling; so can lifetime love affairs. While ethical sluts may choose to have some kinds of relationships and not others, we believe that all relationships have the potential to teach us, move us. and above all give us pleasure."
"You don't need a lot of "thou shalt nots" to be an ethical person. Honesty, empathy, foresight, integrity, intelligence and respect will do just fine."
Everyone is wonderful, there is no need to be ashamed of anything because if you do, it will cost you your happiness. Respect yourself and people around you.
China: Part III
Friday, 29 August 2008
Last time, I said I was going to Xitang, but I'll not talk about that in this post, maybe later...
Let's continue with the third week, which is probably the worst of all, or maybe the best after all.
What happened? One day, I came back to my room and saw my roomate lying on the bed with his sunglasses on, he was probably crying. He told me that his girlfriend in Canada is mad that he's sharing a room with a girl and she'd rather break up than to let this continue. In my head it was like, I feel sorry for you but this is not my fault, so if someone has to move out, that person is not me. Then, he went to talk with Antoine and Eric to see if they could switch so that he stays with Antoine and I stay with Eric. Then all three came in my room to "talk" but it was more like forcing, not physically but mentally. I felt like they are all against me, as if it was my fault and that I should help william...It's because, william is just my roomate, and who's gonna help me then? I didn't even wanna talk and just walked out.
If I had to be in the same room as Eric...really i'd have nightmares...It's like a punishment. Girls, here's my advice, if you wanna pretend that you are not jealous, then pretend until the end, if you cannot, then just admit that you are jealous, you will make people's life easier. And Boys, I have a piece of advice for you too, do not trust your girlfriend if she says that she trust you, this statement is only true when you are in her field of vision. Sad but true!
During that week, I just went out a few times with Kevin (the guy I met last week). My roomate came back late everynight, probably trying avoid me. So I felt kind of bad for him and I cannot live like this for two months seeing his stupid crybaby face everyday. So in the end, I agreed to change roomate and my new roomate is...Eric. It was thursday I think and luckily Eric was going to Beijing for the whole weekend. I heard he steals shampoo and stuff like that so imagine how I am going to live! When he was away, I tortured his bed and his clothes and I'd put weird products in the shampoo in case he steals mine (I have another one for myself obviously).
That weekend, I went to Coco again and I met another guy! His name is Jay, a korean student at the same university but in another campus. Nothing special happened with him, but I felt bad for Kevin (the guy I met last week). Kevin thinks that I'm his girlfriend and I cannot blame him for that. He is a good guy, he's sweet and innocent. I really didn't wanna hurt him, but I did it, that's how stupid I am.
Back to Jay, that's him:
He is so cute with his small little eyes. That night, I went home really late, or really early I should say, around 5-6 am (the clubs close around 5). He promised to call me, but waited until the last week, he was probably shy...most asian guys I met in China are pretty shy. We met again at SOS and I did something really wrong. It happens often, but that time, I was TOO stupid. But that's not the point of this post so I'll skip this for now.
I think it was on sunday night, Eric came back from Beijing and we had a fight (not physically of course). Here’s what happened. I came back to the dorm and he wasn't even studying, he was talking to someone. So I just decided to watch TV and 2 minutes later he says that he wants to study and tells me to turn the TV off. It's like hello, you think you're the king or what! If you need to study, I need to entertain myself too. The TV can't be moved but you can, so who's gonna move? Then, he just went to unplug the cable. I was so mad, so I said to turn the light off because I wanted to sleep even though it wasn't true, I just wanted to piss him off. In the end I lost my temper and threw his stuff outside and blah-blah-blah so I had to call Duan Laoshi and he said that he'll find me another room tomorrow. God...that's what he should've done since the beginning. After, I heard Teedah saying that I'm rude. I only yelled at Eric, not at her. Plus, I don't even remember talking to this girl before. Teedah, are you trying to make yourself sound more interesting? Maybe you can just say that you're jealous, you'll might get more attention.
The next day, I moved to the international building, the one where Kevin lives. By coincidence, my room is not only on the same floor as Kevin, but in the same wing too! I don't know what to think, because that would mean that I'd probably see him everyday. The room is tiny but there's everything exept annoying canadians and cockroaches. Honestly, I was a bit scared to sleep alone, maybe not scared, but I'm not so used to that. Oh, but I love it because I can sleep NAKED!
That's the room:
Here's something I don't like from the Concordia Program, it leaves us little chance to interact with other students because Concordia student all live on the same floor and take the same classes...I know that's the most logical thing to do, but...there is something missing in the whole experience. So yeah, I was saying that it was probably the best week, because I got away from it. The international building has a different atmosphere that I really like. Ok, both buildings are for international students but one's for americans (mostly) and one's for asians (mostly). In the american building, even if they can speak chinese, they'd still communicate with you in english. In the asian building, people only speak their native language and Chinese, so I was able to interact in Chinese a lot more and meet other students. I felt like I was becoming Asian on the inside. Even though my skin is yellow, that was the very first time I felt the asian part of me and I absolutely love it!
Let's continue with the third week, which is probably the worst of all, or maybe the best after all.
What happened? One day, I came back to my room and saw my roomate lying on the bed with his sunglasses on, he was probably crying. He told me that his girlfriend in Canada is mad that he's sharing a room with a girl and she'd rather break up than to let this continue. In my head it was like, I feel sorry for you but this is not my fault, so if someone has to move out, that person is not me. Then, he went to talk with Antoine and Eric to see if they could switch so that he stays with Antoine and I stay with Eric. Then all three came in my room to "talk" but it was more like forcing, not physically but mentally. I felt like they are all against me, as if it was my fault and that I should help william...It's because, william is just my roomate, and who's gonna help me then? I didn't even wanna talk and just walked out.
If I had to be in the same room as Eric...really i'd have nightmares...It's like a punishment. Girls, here's my advice, if you wanna pretend that you are not jealous, then pretend until the end, if you cannot, then just admit that you are jealous, you will make people's life easier. And Boys, I have a piece of advice for you too, do not trust your girlfriend if she says that she trust you, this statement is only true when you are in her field of vision. Sad but true!
During that week, I just went out a few times with Kevin (the guy I met last week). My roomate came back late everynight, probably trying avoid me. So I felt kind of bad for him and I cannot live like this for two months seeing his stupid crybaby face everyday. So in the end, I agreed to change roomate and my new roomate is...Eric. It was thursday I think and luckily Eric was going to Beijing for the whole weekend. I heard he steals shampoo and stuff like that so imagine how I am going to live! When he was away, I tortured his bed and his clothes and I'd put weird products in the shampoo in case he steals mine (I have another one for myself obviously).
That weekend, I went to Coco again and I met another guy! His name is Jay, a korean student at the same university but in another campus. Nothing special happened with him, but I felt bad for Kevin (the guy I met last week). Kevin thinks that I'm his girlfriend and I cannot blame him for that. He is a good guy, he's sweet and innocent. I really didn't wanna hurt him, but I did it, that's how stupid I am.
Back to Jay, that's him:
He is so cute with his small little eyes. That night, I went home really late, or really early I should say, around 5-6 am (the clubs close around 5). He promised to call me, but waited until the last week, he was probably shy...most asian guys I met in China are pretty shy. We met again at SOS and I did something really wrong. It happens often, but that time, I was TOO stupid. But that's not the point of this post so I'll skip this for now.
I think it was on sunday night, Eric came back from Beijing and we had a fight (not physically of course). Here’s what happened. I came back to the dorm and he wasn't even studying, he was talking to someone. So I just decided to watch TV and 2 minutes later he says that he wants to study and tells me to turn the TV off. It's like hello, you think you're the king or what! If you need to study, I need to entertain myself too. The TV can't be moved but you can, so who's gonna move? Then, he just went to unplug the cable. I was so mad, so I said to turn the light off because I wanted to sleep even though it wasn't true, I just wanted to piss him off. In the end I lost my temper and threw his stuff outside and blah-blah-blah so I had to call Duan Laoshi and he said that he'll find me another room tomorrow. God...that's what he should've done since the beginning. After, I heard Teedah saying that I'm rude. I only yelled at Eric, not at her. Plus, I don't even remember talking to this girl before. Teedah, are you trying to make yourself sound more interesting? Maybe you can just say that you're jealous, you'll might get more attention.
The next day, I moved to the international building, the one where Kevin lives. By coincidence, my room is not only on the same floor as Kevin, but in the same wing too! I don't know what to think, because that would mean that I'd probably see him everyday. The room is tiny but there's everything exept annoying canadians and cockroaches. Honestly, I was a bit scared to sleep alone, maybe not scared, but I'm not so used to that. Oh, but I love it because I can sleep NAKED!
That's the room:
Here's something I don't like from the Concordia Program, it leaves us little chance to interact with other students because Concordia student all live on the same floor and take the same classes...I know that's the most logical thing to do, but...there is something missing in the whole experience. So yeah, I was saying that it was probably the best week, because I got away from it. The international building has a different atmosphere that I really like. Ok, both buildings are for international students but one's for americans (mostly) and one's for asians (mostly). In the american building, even if they can speak chinese, they'd still communicate with you in english. In the asian building, people only speak their native language and Chinese, so I was able to interact in Chinese a lot more and meet other students. I felt like I was becoming Asian on the inside. Even though my skin is yellow, that was the very first time I felt the asian part of me and I absolutely love it!
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